I’m sorry. I’ve been judging you and your situation for far too long and now, I’m apologizing. I’m apologizing because In my own mind, I’ve created my own interpretation of what happened that night. I’m apologizing for forming an opinion without having all of the facts. I apologize for forgetting the reality that I came from, when I should actually be commending you for making a decision to leave an abusive relationship. Abuse is abuse, whether it’s the first time or the 31st time. And many women don’t have the option of leaving because their only option is death.

But I remember…

I remember being choked for waking him up.

I remember being thrown on the ground and stomped in the ribs because I was ready to take my baby home.

I remember seeing the flash of chrome out the corner of my eye as he pulled out his gun to shoot me because I wanted him to stop getting high.

I remember…

I remember going to the police station to file charges because I realized that this was not the life for me. As you have said on several occassions, “I wasn’t bout that life”. I remember…

I remember being called stupid by my friend because I wanted you arrested. “Girl, you stupid! Now how he gonna take care of your baby, if he get locked up? Yall will be good in a few days”.

Yes, I remember. And because I remember, I apologize.

I wish you the best, Evelyn Lozada.

Be Blessed,

Sharmetra Pittman